May

Much of May was spent stressing about my impending viva. For those not in the know, this is the way in which a PhD thesis is passed or failed in England. Two examiners (one from within your institution, and one from outside) are chosen, and they fire questions at you for however long is deemed necessary for them to determine that you are not a complete fuckwit.

In the week before, my boss (Tom) kindly went through my thesis question spotting for me. The reams of paper I got back did nothing to increase my confidence. I just kept thinking that I would walk into the room, and they’d realise what a total airhead I was. And fail me. Fortunately, the voices of reason within my department pointed out that if my thesis wasn’t good enough, I wouldn’t have been allowed to submit.

I already knew the references were not up to scratch, and was planning to make a pre-emptive strike against my examiners by sorting it all out before the viva. Somewhat predictably, it never happened.

In the hour before, I felt surprisingly calm, and once the questions started, I barely stopped talking for the three or so hours it had taken. Despite all the stressing, I realised I would have done just fine if I hadn’t even picked up a copy of my thesis since it was submitted in January.

I was given a month to make minor corrections (mostly sorting out the references), but I passed!

I walked back over to my office to find my sister had shown up to congratulate me (with champagne and cookies)... she seemed slightly disappointed that I was not surprised to see her. I knew she’d be there! Anyway, much alcohol was drunk, and I staggered home wondering what all the fuss had been about.