Personal Soundtracks

A little while ago, a post on my sister’s Livejournal page concerned personal theme tunes. Scrolling through my newly compiled MP3 library, I got thinking about various songs, and what they mean to me. So this list is my compilation, kind of a soundtrack to my life. I can’t be bothered to add any kind of a biography to my profile, and besides, for better or worse, I think this says more about me.

The songs are broadly in chronological order. I don’t think they fully reflect my taste in music – the songs that stick are not always the classics - but it should give you some idea.

The Camera Never Lies – Bucks Fizz
OK, so the song sucks little green monkey dicks, but it was the first record I ever bought. I was eight years old and knew no better.

I’ve Been Losing You – a-ha
Sucks less. I used to love a-ha when I was about 12 (it was always Mags, not Morten that did it for me…) and my long-suffering sister took me twice to see them live at Hammersmith. Scored major cool-points at school.

Bad Medicine – Bon Jovi
I loved this song from the first time I heard it, and it probably did more than any other to get me into rock music. Although I did go off the band (they got poppier the same time my tastes got somewhat heavier) this song still reminds me of my high school friends and the gigs we went to.

Piece of Me – Skid Row
Currently designated as my personal theme tune, this song kicks arse.
I loved Skid Row, and the first time I saw them live was at the Marquee. I was 15, and had never seen anything quite like it before. They strutted onstage to the sounds of They’re Coming To Take Me Away, having conquered Milton Keynes the previous day while supporting Bon Jovi. My parents didn’t want me heading home by myself (the fact it was a licensed club, and I was therefore three years underage didn’t appear to bother them); I was only allowed to go after my sister kindly agreed to come and pick me up. By the end of the (fucking amazing) gig, I was covered in my sweat, sweat from the audience, sweat from the band (I was right down the front), beer, water that had been thrown over me, water that had been spat over me, and God-knows what else. My sister was standing in the foyer as I staggered out, she just looked at me in a what-the-fuck-happened-to-you kind of way. With a stupid grin on my face, I told her the 6’ 4” then-lead singer had stage-dived onto me. I have some vague recollection of her eyeballs rolling.

Paint it Black – The Rolling Stones
My Mum kindly took me to see the Stones at Wembley Stadium when I was 16. It was a great day, and I always loved this song… and it kind of reminds me of my wardrobe.

Harvester of Sorrow – Metallica
Pretty much sums up my time at Sixth Form College.

Killed by Death – Motorhead
You get home, and you’re pissed off and you just want to rip someone’s head off? Try playing this instead. Perfect for anger management. Or try this.

Father Time – Richie Sambora
Autumn 1992. I was 18 years old, and had no idea what I wanted to do. So the week after my sister’s wedding, I got on a plane and headed off to travel around the US for a few months. This song is a pretty cheesy ballad. It certainly wasn’t the first song off the album to grab me, but I kept listening to it over and over as the plane approached JFK. Even though I listened to the album (Stranger in this Town) frequently while on long bus journeys – it was perfect late-night road music - I always associated this particular track with the excitement and anticipation of arriving, alone, in a new place. I had an amazing three months, and when I reluctantly got on the plane to return to London, I put on my walkman, thinking it was at the start of the tape. I immediately heard the intro to this song; it brought back what felt like a thousand memories, and I promptly burst into tears.

Little Wing – Skid Row
I love this version of the Hendrix classic. It was great Greyhound music, and I loved listening to it, late at night, watching the world go by, and feeling strangely peaceful.

I Wanna Be Your Dog – The Stooges
I first heard The Stooges while getting somewhat stoned in a LA hostel. I love this song. So much. You know that question you sometimes get asked? If you could go back in time and be someone else, who would it be? For me, there is no debate: Iggy Pop, late sixties (that’s the decade, not his age, by the way.) Sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll… what more could you want?! And he’s not dead.

Try a Little Tenderness – The Commitments Soundtrack
To help me get off the beaten track, I opted to do a three-week tour with a company called Trek-America. One minibus, thirteen youngish back-packer types and a tour leader called Scott - who loved The Commitments Soundtrack. To this day, he remains one of only three guys I’ve ever really come close to falling for. I said goodbye to him in the car park of a Los Angeles hotel. I wish I could remember exactly what he said to me. He told me he had recently met a woman in Vegas, but implied that in other circumstances, there could have been something between us. Anyway, he wins my prize for The Most Ambiguous Goodbye.

Bad to the Bone – George Thorogood
November ’92. We waited until dark, dressed in black, then snuck up onto a not-quite-finished bridge over the Mississippi, just outside of New Orleans. Had bungee cord attached… I would like to say I jumped, but after repeatedly chickening out, I lost my balance and fell off the edge of the bridge. Undignified, but fun. The adrenaline was still flowing when we got back to the van, and this song was playing when the radio came on. Always reminds me of a great night.

Would? – Alice in Chains
I love this song, but it will always bring back memories of New York, Christmas 1992. A guy called Neil, who I’d met in a bar after a long day shopping, asked me out. I wanted to see Warrior Soul play at The Limelight, so I took him as my date. That night, I got what are still the best kisses of my life. We kissed in the queue to get into the club. We kissed standing down near the front of the stage, while the DJ played this song. We kissed afterwards. I dream of someone kissing me like that again. People have come close (in some cases, very close), but never quite hit the same mark. I did, however, learn things from Neil. For example, if a guy can’t see you on a Tuesday night ‘cause he has to go to Narcotics Anonymous as a condition of his parole, don’t expect too much from him.

I Want To Take You Higher – Sly and the Family Stone
New years eve ’94. New York City. This song just reminds me of the bar I spent the night in. It was in the East Village, and had previously been a toy shop. The bar owners decided to keep the theme, so named the bar Babyland. They had toy chests instead of tables. Cute place, and cute date… an Italian-American called Joe.

Enola Gay – OMD
1995 - Was never really too into the song, but it reminds me of a weekend in ’95 when I decided on a whim to fly to Madrid to see Skid Row. I can’t/won’t go into the details here, but it was 48 hours of over-indulgence and debauchery. What I wouldn’t give for a little bit of that now. Oh, and the gig was good, too!

I Wanna Get Some – Warrior Soul
Do I, fuck. Whenever I hear this, I remember all the gigs I used to go to with Mandy (mostly Skid Row, Warrior Soul, White Zombie and Marilyn Manson). We used to travel all over the country, misbehaving en route. We’ve since lost touch, but they were great years.

If It Makes You Happy – Sheryl Crow
Another contender for personal theme tune. Although I did initially mis-hear the lyrics. She sang: put on a poncho. I heard: put on a porn show. I just thought, hell yeah! It’s a shame, really.

Just in Lust – The Wildhearts
Reminds me of a drum-tech I once knew. ‘nuff said.

The Fairytale of New York – The Pogues w/ Kirsty MacColl
At Christmas, my then-boss used to put on cheesy compilations of fucking awful carols. When she went to the bank, I used to swap her CDs for either this or Leonard Cohen. Fortunately, she did have a sense of humour.

Like Swimming – Morphine
My ex-boss also turned me onto Morphine. It started when she bought the soundtrack to Get Shorty, which included a couple of their songs. We went to see them at The Garage in ’97, and it was one of the best gigs I’ve ever been to. Mark walked onstage, and in the sexiest voice imaginable, said “Hi, we’re Morphine. We’re from Boston.” If they'd walked straight off stage again, I would have been disappointed, but I wouldn’t have felt cheated out of my £8.00 admission. Mark Sandman, RIP.

Bionic – Placebo
Maybe this is not something I should say here, but fuck it… I’ve already made enough implications about battery-operated toys. When I used to live with my parents, their bedroom was next door to mine. They used to get pissed off about the volume of my late-night music… basically it was a cover so they wouldn’t hear me buzzing the bean, so to speak. Metallica was always useful, as their songs are pretty long, but there was nothing quite like Placebo. Harder, faster… indeed! And I still can’t help smiling when I hear the intro to Come Home…

Only Happy When It Rains – Garbage
A serious contender for personal theme tune.

Riders on the Storm – The Doors
I used to programme this on repeat play as a cure for insomnia; I think it was a combination of being tucked up in a warm bed while listening to the bass line and the rain. When I told my (then) boss, she bought me a CD that just had recordings of thunderstorms. I used to love it, but after living in a bed-sit where the roof used to leak over my bed, the sound of the rain is now less comforting.

To The Moon and Back – Savage Garden
Being a water-baby, I had wanted to learn to dive since I tried SCUBA in a pool when I was 10. I finally learnt while in Bali – I was 24. The whole holiday was more beautiful than I could have anticipated, and changed my life forever. I still can’t decide if I like this song, but it was playing everywhere I went, and will always being back the fondest memories of Kuta

Romeo and Juliet – Dire Straits
I spent the summer of 2000 in the Azores. One night, some of the local students took us on a night-time tour of the island we were staying on. Dire Straits was on the car stereo as we parked up on the side of a volcano, looking down on the lights of Ponta Delgada and up at the stars. By dawn, we were sitting on the eastern side of the island, having a barbeque and waiting for the sun to come up. Great times.

Man! I Feel Like a Woman! – Shania Twain
Man! I hate this song! But I also like it in a strange way, as it always reminds me of the pub I worked in for a few months while I was an undergraduate. Just about everyone in the place would stop trying to bullshit each other long enough to sing along with the chorus.

Black Coffee – All Saints
This song takes me back to the bed-sit where I lived as an undergraduate. I used to play this song when I was revising for my final year exams. I never paid attention to all the lyrics, but the “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but here” just made me remember that however stressed I was, I was in a situation I had put myself in, and I wouldn’t swap it for anything… I wanted my degree.

Dames – 42nd Street (cast recording)
I saw 42nd Street in the West End when I was about 13. Catherine Zeta Jones played Peggy Sawyer, and aside from my Mum signing Lullaby of Broadway all the way home, I loved it. Early 2002, I spent 10 days in New York. I heard there was a new production of the show on Broadway, so I went to check out the ticket prices. I loved the concept of "rush tickets." Basically, they hold the front row for VIPs, and if none show, they sell off the $100 seats to students – for $20 a shot. My seat was right in the middle of the front row. The show was totally over the top, but amazing. I just sat there with a big smile on my face throughout, then floated back to my hotel feeling totally blissed out.

Billie Jean – Michael Jackson
I never really liked this song, but now it reminds me of Neil, a 22-year old from Virginia. We were on the same bus between Noosa and Hervey Bay in Queensland last year. We got chatting during a meal break, and he asked me if I’d like to meet up with him that evening for a drink. He was incredibly cute – I just thought he was being friendly. I’ve never been able to tell if a guy is remotely interested in me. I don’t tend to dance, but the way he grabbed me when this song came on left me little choice. I didn’t pick up on the fact that I was being picked up until he had his hand down the back of my skirt and his tongue in my ear. As certain people never tire of telling me, I am truly useless.

Love Shack – The B52s
I always liked this song, but now it reminds me of being in Australia last year. Got in a plane, ascended to 14 000 feet, and was strapped to a nice man called Meru. He proceeded to throw us out of the “perfectly good aircraft” over Mission Beach, doing multiple somersaults at my request! Serious contender for the biggest ever high. On the drive back to Cairns, this played on the radio. The adrenaline had worn off to leave a calm, playful confidence. I’m normally pretty reserved and shy, but I just wanted to find a pub, so I could put his on the jukebox (it’s always on a jukebox), sing along and dance on the bar.

Replica – The Ga Ga’s
Last November, Skid Row played their first UK dates in eight years. It had been so long, I didn’t expect to get the same kick out of seeing them live, but I enjoyed the London gig so much I went to see them in Cardiff. It was an interesting night for many, many reasons… but I remember feeling a little strange lusting over the rather young looking lead singer of The Ga Ga’s. I felt actively disturbed when I found out he was 20, and almost dirty when I learnt he was from Somerset (...you know how I feel about that place).

I don’t know yet if there will be songs that remind me of this period of my life. I suspect a couple of chillout compilations will forever remind me of the taste of strong coffee and stress.

Time will tell.